About this site

Why it exists

Almost everything written about the lifestyle falls into one of two categories: content designed to titillate, and content designed to sell something. Neither is much use when what you actually want to know is how to raise the subject with your partner, what happens at a club, or whether feeling jealous means you should stop.

Those are the questions we cover, at the length they actually deserve.

What we do not do

• We do not invent statistics. Where we cite research, we describe what it found and what its limitations are. Where no reliable figure exists, we say so instead of producing one.
• We do not list clubs, venues or addresses. Venues open and close constantly, and a page claiming otherwise is usually either out of date or fabricated. We describe how scenes are shaped instead.
• We do not publish fabricated personal stories. There are no invented testimonials on this site.
• We do not pretend there is one right way to do this. Couples differ on almost everything, and where they do we say so.

How it is funded

Through affiliate links. If you create a profile on a platform we link to, we may earn a commission at no additional cost to you. That is the entire business model and there is nothing else going on.

The relevant thing to know is that it does not change what we write. The advice on this site is the same advice we would give without the links, which is why several pages tell you plainly that most couples never need a paid platform, that clubs are not necessary, and that stopping is a perfectly good outcome.

Editorial approach

Where something is contested, we describe the disagreement rather than picking a side and presenting it as settled. Where something is genuinely unknown, we say that. Where the honest answer is discouraging — that single men have a hard time, that a week-long trip is a poor first experience, that a reluctant partner is a serious problem — we give it anyway.

One theme runs through everything: consent and honesty between partners. Not as a disclaimer, but because every account of this going badly points to the same cause — someone agreed to something they did not want.

Corrections

If something here is wrong, out of date or misleading, we would rather know. Get in touch and we will look at it.

Who this is for

Adults, over 18, who are curious. It is written primarily for couples, because that is who most of the questions come from, but a good deal of it applies to anyone thinking about consensual non-monogamy.